Let’s start with certainty. I’m no philosopher. Or at least, I’m not a recognized philosopher.
Perhaps the closest I’ll get to being a philosopher is thinking about how many times I can squeeze the word philosopher into this first paragraph. Guessing some liberal arts school in Oregon will get bumped down by this article and its philosopher-heavy diatribe.
Thinker in Paris
But enough of that. The reason I brought up heavy thinking is that I took a long walk at Walden Pond today and I was inspired to think. What came to mind was NOT something by Thoreau, but something by Emerson. It was a guide to help us move forward.
On a Monday, going into the international break, after a loss to West Ham. Our first loss of the season and a loss that pushed us into third or lower (I can’t look) by Tuesday, November 9. After all that, I needed to think a bit and forget a lot.
In Ted Lasso’s words, “Be a goldfish.”
In Ralph Waldo Emerson’s words, “Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be cumbered with your old nonsense.”
I DO have too high a spirit to be ‘cumbered’ by my old nonsense. Today, I provide you with new nonsense in the form of my thoughts via a slew of football opinions in no particular order.
The only reason I can’t afford more than a simple pint and a few bangers at the pub is that I spend all my money on 42 different streaming services so I can see my Reds!
If they’re going to let the players shout swears and grab their nether regions on international TV, they should drop the facade of hands in front of their mouths. It’s 2021, own your words.
This year – amidst all the success (save West Ham today) – the singing hasn’t been as loud as I remember in the pub. It’s likely because of smaller numbers going out on match day. But I still miss feeling the noise in a loud pub.
The vibrant ball they use in the fall and winter would be a perfect gift for someone who writes about Liverpool in a fabulous online magazine (my birthday is in April). Also, am I the only one who clicks like Pavlov on every LFC email offering a discount?
Corollary – can you have too many scarves?
Is the team headed for a big player turnover next season? Or will it depend solely on a few contracts and where we end up? The only reason I’m curious is I’ve been binging Ted Lasso and now I think I’m Higgins.
The best beverage to enjoy with a match at the pub is a Guinness. Carlsberg is the sentimental favorite, and it’s less expensive. But for me, a European match requires a beverage you can nurse for 42 minutes.
I’d like the option of watching a match broadcast from a birds-eye perspective. Totally birds-eye, from directly above the center circle. That might help me understand some of the shapes the squad takes and the passing that takes place within different shapes.
I also think it will never happen for a full match (if at all) because from above you could only do play-by-play based on player hairstyles.
From my seat over here in the United States, it seems that a lot of people in the crowds are younger kids. I thought match tickets in England were impossible to get unless you knew royalty.
It’s usually the oblivious, big-headed supporters who weave their giant noggin about blocking each of three TVs on the wall in front of you.
I’m puzzled why more stats aren’t shared on broadcast TV of matches. Meaning player stats. Distance run; heart rate; etc. I recall seeing it for some league a few years ago, and I thought it was cool then, too.
Stone marker points the way…
I’m convinced a percentage of falls on the pitch is just dancing moves so managers and players can get back on the same page.
It’s astounding that one referee can see so much activity on the field and get calls right an overwhelming percentage of the time. I would not want that job.
Why isn’t there a skills competition (like an all-star game) for the EPL? I would love to see folks curl shots wildly and drop a ball 70 yards away on a dime. I guess each week is a skills competition, but I’m invested too heavily emotionally in the outcome. At a skills thing, I could just watch and enjoy.
Spilled drinks, stained coats, and lots of jostling are the only things that can come from wearing a lot of layers to the pub on match day. Be brave. Wear your kit, a scarf, and then cover up your extremities. Then you’re not taking up useful space when you get inside.
Winter’s coming! Enjoy the end of fall.
Without question, fans should be able to keep any ball they catch. Teams are paying dozens of millions of dollars just for the chance to use a player. They could afford to lose a few balls. Absolute worst case they lose 10 balls a match (100 per match week and let’s say 40 weeks for easy maths) they’re paying $400,000 to make all fans happy – because of the prospect of catching a ball and then getting to keep it is a gleeful outcome.
Sometimes I still wonder how the players don’t get distracted by all the ads being projected around the pitchside.
With that, I think my nonsense meter is on overload and I’m going to forget my absurdities.
See you in this space again soon. The next column is more nuts and bolts and strategy. Really! Thanks to reader Adam Zand for the idea! If you have a thought for a column, leave a comment here and if I can weave your thoughts into a compelling read, I’ll do it.
Thanks for reading! J