Liverpool vs Chelsea Player Ratings by Stephen Ward and Jason Kennedy

It almost turned out a two hour bust

And nothing would have been more unjust

But no one pulled a hammy

Adrian saved from Tammy,

And we’re reminded, In Jurgen We Trust

  • Woody

Second verse, same as the first

  • Jason
  • PS — CTQO!

Woody: Great game.  Let’s hope they’re not all that great; some of us have old tickers.  Chelsea is good.  #22 is unplayable.  But we are all still Champions of Europe.  Yes, that’s a joke.  Chelsea and Zenit (??!!) will be in pot 1 for the group stage draw.  Chicago politics has nothing on UEFA, let alone FIFA.  On to the ratings.

Adrian – 8.5

Woody – 9 – Borderline 10 given the circumstances.  Massive save in extra time save.  Just betters his slightly younger, slightly more expensive countryman in pens.  Looked like he might be slightly enjoying this after being out of contract at West Ham.  Resurrected like Travolta in Pulp Fiction.  Yes, we know he’s crazy.  Speaking of which Migs shipped 3 in UCL quals yesterday.

Jason – 8 –  Oh the Rocky memes, gifs and references that we need but did not know we needed until the end of the penalty shoot out. I can’t wait until I find a way to get Mickey references in “You’re gonna eat lightning and crap thunder!” – I hope Jurgen uses that in his pep talks. His distributions left much to desire but 8 for the save.

Gomez – 7.25 

W – 8 – Made sense to start him there tonight.  Cleaned up a few times.  Good in attack.  Nothing new.  Excellent player improving his versatility all the time.

J – 6.5 – Was shaky to me all game, kept allowing the through ball through (say that a few times fast, after a few Carlsbergs). Just did not impress me.


Matip – 6.5

W – 7 – Terrible giveaway to create a Chelsea scoring chance in the first.  Also shut down Pulisic a couple times before everyone else realized he was the most dangerous player on the pitch first half.  Hilariously dribbled all the way into the Chelsea box late.  Overall solid.  We’ll need him.

J – 6 – I love Big Joel “Pillows for Feet” Matip but he was awful with the passing. Needs to remind himself that he brings the ball out much more effectively. Thought he was going to dribble into the Chelsea goal late in match, which would have been lovely. Also gave a shoulder shiver to some Chelski punk which I enjoyed.


VVD – 7.75

W – 8 – Absolutely should have scored that header from the corner first half.  But made up for it by being his usual gigantic, intelligent, well positioned athletic self from then on.

J – 7.5 – defense has been a tad shaky of late. Not that he’s responsible but he’s VVD, the Colossus – fix those damn issues. Maybe kill a squad player in practice to get the point across.

Robbo – 7

W – 7 – Not his marauding self but good to see him play some defensive position when called upon.  Think Arsenal on the 24th.

J- 7 – Meh. Should we be concerned? Nah. Its Robbo. Give him some of Milly’s Ribena, he’ll be right as rain.

Milner – 7

W- 7 – For a 33yo dude who’s all about work rate and workboots, Milly’s hair is awfully well-coiffed for a game.  He might be a little vain, which is good cuz it’s why he keeps winning that weird stamina test every preseason.  That said he loves to clean somebody out at exactly the right time.  Milly could play 5 more years as the 3rd best fullback in the league.  And he’d still be the 3rd best in LFC.  And he might just do that.

J – 7- The guy is a machine and it can only go as low as a 7 in ratings I think. He ended up covering damn near the whole pitch at times. Knows how to tackle and isn’t afraid to do it.

Fabinho – 7.75

W – 8 – This game was wide open.  Fab was a step behind a few times, but more often a step ahead.  More than anyone I think this crazy super cup will snap Fabinho into 90-minute intensity.

J – 7.5 – Another guy who had a lot to cover. Cramps up then makes a penalty kick. Got to love the bait and switch. Overall decent but

Hendo – 8

W – 8 – He doesn’t have anything like the touch of our other attackers, but somehow he does join in and help create sometimes.  Even I have to admit that.  And he is a genuine footballer all over the pitch.  There are lots of cliches for the team first, leader type dudes.  He has those things.  But he also has an incredibly varied skill set.  Maybe I’m warming to him.

J – 8 – Again, like all the midfielders, tons to cover. Was better in the second half. Knows how to lift a Cup and like he wants to do that a lot this season.

Ox – 6

W – 6 – We love the Ox, but what exactly is going on?  Jurgen hinted he’s still not at full fitness.  Let’s hope he wasn’t tonight because he was invisible.  We still can’t give Ox a 5.

J- 6 – and this could be lower. What was he doing exactly? And where? And when? I write this off as a bad match and move on. He’ll be right as rain as soon as he has some of Milly’s tea.

Mo – 8

W – 8 – I liked when Mo positioned the ball for a corner with just his feet.  Everyone places it.  Mo doesn’t need hands.  Robbo doesn’t need hands – well, he needs one hand.  No I mean cuz his right foot is just ok.  Get your heads out of the gutter.

J – 8 – Three season wonder.

Mane – 9  MOTM (for Woody)

W – 9 – Always on the move.  Darting.  Creating.  Oh and scoring.  Does Sadio like bright lights and European football?  Something tells me these games are popular in Senegal.

J – 9 – the guy is great and once we brought on Bobby was a true terror for Chelsea. He’s really fun to watch. Great banter with a ball boy on the sideline


Firmino – 9.25 MOTM (for Jason)

W – 9 – If we were lazy we would just have given everyone a 5 for the first half and a 9 thereafter.  Such was the impact of Bobby.  Silkiest touch in world football.  Ok Messi.  Best in tight spaces.  Ok still Messi.  But Bobby is awfully close on both and plays his tail off all the time.  We like him.

J – 9.5 – Whole match changed once he got on the pitch. Thank God. Completely different team with him off/on.  Should be the first name on the team sheet. My MOTM

Trent – 7

W -7 – Got spun around the first few minutes he came on but settled in.  No worries with TAA.

J – 7 – fresh legs helped us and further improved the team. I still weirdly expected more from him but I am an idiot.

Gini – 7

W – 7 – Also didn’t do anything to help or hurt the team.  Very Gini.  Until we need a brace against Barca.

J -7 – solid and dependable.

Divock – 7

W – 7 – We were SURE he would score.  This game was so open and long even Sadio looked tired.  He never looks tired.  Anyway Div came on, was a reasonable threat, and buried his penalty.

J -7 – The narrative demanded he score in some 120+6 fashion. Alas took a good penalty. Likely some OJ post-match